How do YOU do Christmas?

My blog friend Mrs. Chili over at The Blue Door posted a meme on Monday about the holidays. And as I read her responses, I couldn't help but reflect on traditions around the holidays. We all have so many. And so many of us have the SAME traditions. And yet, we each tweak them just a bit to fit our own personal likes and the needs of our families. Comparing and contrasting seemed like fun. So you can check our her thoughts on the holidays and then see what I had to say on the same topics...

1. Real tree or Artificial?  Believe it or not, we have one of each. The real tree is in the family room and covered with all our favorite old ornaments and kid crafts, etc. And all our colored lights. And that is the tree the presents go underneath. But some years we also put up an artificial tree in the living room with white lights and more formal ornaments. This year...just the real one.
2. Do you like decorating the tree? Parts of it. I always have to put the tree in the stand and get the lights on ahead of time. I don’t love that part. But the ornaments are all done with the whole family and that part is fun.
3. When do you put up the tree? It varies...usually around the second weekend of December. This year, I put the tree in the stand and put on the lights tonight. We'll all put on the ornaments tomorrow evening.
4. When do you take the tree down?  Usually about a week after New Year’s.
5. Do you like eggnog? Oh I do! Most of the folks in my family do not, so when we buy it, I know I’m only sharing with Son1, so that means a lot for me.
6. Ever broken a present right after opening it? I don’t think so.
7 . Hardest person to buy for? My wife. And it is my fault. I put too much pressure on myself to get the perfect gift every time.
8. Easiest person to buy for? Our daughter. She always provides us with a color-coded list with appropriate hyperlinks to web sites, reviews, etc.
9. Do you have a nativity scene? We do.
10. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail. But we have been narrowing our list of who gets them every year. What a chore to do that whole process.
11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Underwear. From my mom. And not when I was a kid.
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? It’s A Wonderful Life. I know...how predictable.
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? As soon as possible after Black Friday is over and those folks go home.
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Honestly, not that I can remember.
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Thing. Singular. Then I would have to pick my wife’s rouladen. We have that for our Christmas dinner every year. I love it.
16. Have you ever actually eaten fruit cake? Sure. Often as a kid. Not so often as an adult. See, I really do learn as I grow!
17. Favorite Christmas song? Again with the singular! I’m pretty sure I can’t narrow it down to one song so I won’t even try. I’ll just say that I love Christmas music. I love the traditional songs such as Oh Holy Night and White Christmas. Plus I love some of the new stuff by The Roaches, Sara McLaughlin, and others. And I’m warning you, I love to sing along...which isn’t always a pretty thing.
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? We’ve been at home for the holidays for a long time now.
19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer?  Absolutely.
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? Angel on the real tree. When we use the artificial tree, a big red bow.
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Both. It works like this. When our kids were very young (in fact, when there was only “kid” without the “s”) we started letting them open one small give on Christmas Eve. We were trying to take the edge off cause he/they would be so excited about the whole thing we were afraid they were going to explode. So one gift the night before.....that we selected cause we wanted to make sure it was a small one....and then all the rest Christmas morning. That tradition is still continued today. And even though two of them are in their 20’s, they would get quite pouty if there was no Christmas Eve gift opening.
22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year?  People who just like to complain about things related to the holidays. Yes, there is more traffic and stores are busy. Relax. We’ll all get home for Christmas.
23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Oh that’s a tough one. If you were there as we decorated the tree, you would think about half of them are my favorites. I grab one to hang up and suddenly start reminiscing about when we bought it or what I remember about it. But if I have to choose a theme or color...I would have to say I love our more crafty/country style ornaments. The colored balls are fun...but I like the wooden ornaments best.
24. Favorite Christmas dinner? That rouladen I mentioned earlier with mashed potatoes, gravy, rolls, a good veggie. And a nice piece of pie for dessert.
25. What do you want for Christmas this year? Easy question! I’m am totally wanting to upgrade to an iPhone.

Twilight

Just in case you've not been paying attention....or don't have a young adolescent girl in the family...Twilight is a book. Which became a series. Which became such a huge best-selling series that there have been many weeks when all four books in the series have been on the NY Times Top Ten list of bestsellers.

And now it is a movie. It premiered on Friday. And Daughter15 has been counting down the days for months! And her and her friends, being the smart little teens that they are, decided it would just be madness to try to attend the movie on opening day. Just too crowded. Sold out theaters. Why would anyone want to do that?!?!

So they waited. They waited all the way to the next day. They planned on seeing the movie on Saturday. Surely they would be able to get in then. After all, the local cinaplex was showing the movie on five different screens!

Well, not wanting to see the looks of disappointment on their faces as they were turned away, I went online ahead of time and purchased tickets for her and her friends to the 4:00 showing yesterday. And yes, they were a giggling bunch of thrilled-ness.

So off we go to drop her and her friends at the theater. However, since I purchased online, the folks in the theater want to see me and my credit card just to make sure the little piece of paper I printed at home matches. So I did have to park and go inside for a moment.

What a sight to behold! It was like walking into some odd tribal celebration. Packs of teen and pre-teen girls roaming the theater. Small groups of 3 or 4. Large groups of 8 0r 10. Small packs merging into larger packs. All there for one simple reason. To see Edward and Jacob and all the other characters as they struggle with their young romances and their vampireness. It was definitely an odd vision...and no place for a sane man to be! So I flashed my card and made a quick exit.

And when it was all over? I picked up my small pack of beaming, smiling, Twilight-thrilled girls. A good time was had by all.

So what to do when it rains?

That's right...the 60/80 conundrum yesterday left us wondering what to do for fun. And all the kids said bowling! Something we had not all done together in years. But we headed to the lanes and had a great time!

Son21...

Daughter14...

and Son17 all showed off their styles.

And they all thought they would kick dad's butt. They didn't! Na na na na na na! But trust me, my score was nothing to brag about. In fact, I have photos of the electronic score sheet. But its my blog and I see no reason to embarrass myself by posting that! :)

A nice celebration

Yesterday was Daughter14's Affirmation ceremony. An Affirmation ceremony is the "coming of age" ceremony at our church.

All 9th grade students spend a year in the Affirmation class. During the year they explore the principles and beliefs of our religion...but also continue to explore a variety of other religious and spiritual pathways. These explorations are combined with discussions of all the "big" topics - what makes a person unique and special; what does each of them value in others; is there a God or Goddess or multiple gods and goddesses and, if so, what form do they take and what is their role in our daily lives; what happens when we die; etc.

It is not easy for a 14 year old to figure out what they believe about these things. It isn't even easy for a 52 year old to figure it out!

But the culminating portion of the class is that each student, working with the two class leaders and their own personal mentor, writes a credo statement about their beliefs at this point in their life. And then those statements are shared with the congregation during the Affirmation ceremony.

My daughter hates speaking in front of a crowd. And she considers any group with more than two people to be a crowd! But the church was packed and she did an awesome job.

In fact, all the kids did a terrific job.

And then there was a nice reception afterwards. I mean, all good events have food...right!?!

Daughter14....you did great! We are very proud of you!!!

That was then...this is now

It is 48 hours since we opened our gifts on Christmas morning. And I'm very aware of how different my Christmas has become.

A few years back, much of Christmas day and the days following would have been filled with assembling toys, helping kids figure out how to use toys, putting stickers and decals on toys, and playing with the kids and their toys.

Now, 48 hours since they opened their gifts, and the only times I've seen the kids have been at meals.

Son20, gleeful over two new games for his Xbox, has barely left his room. I'm sure there is some carpel tunnel stuff going on with that game controller. He has his headphone on, talking with other players around the globe, and barely aware of anything else. Oh sure, he has invited both siblings in to watch and to play. And he even told us how awesome the games were. But other than that, he hasn't been visible.

Son17 got a portable DVD player and some DVD's to watch. Other than checking with us about how to recharge the battery, we haven't talked with him much. For a while he sat in the same room with his headphones on and giggled at The Simpson's Christmas...but eventually we sent him to a different room so we could talk over the laughter.

And Daughter14...got a new iPod. She has shown up for meals...with her ear buds firmly in place. Other than that, it is as if she were abducted by aliens.

And don't get me wrong...our kids got other things. Books, clothes, etc. Things they had requested. But the electronic gadgetry was shining so brightly that those other items got lost in the glow.

Do I miss spending time putting together things? Playing with things? Swearing at the things that don't go together easily? Sure. I miss those days. But it sure feels more relaxing this way. And it even means I get to pay attention to my gifts! That never happened when the kids were young!

Birthday time at our house!

It is official. Daughter13 is now Daughter14. Today is the big day. In fact, just about an hour ago would have been the official moment - 14 years since she entered the world.

We've opened the presents. We've been out to dinner. And in just a little while we'll have the cake (with blue frosting, her favorite color!). And throughout the evening she'll talk on the phone with various relatives near and far.

She is actually having her party with friends a couple of weeks from now. They are all going bowling...which really involves a little bowling and a lot of eating cheese fries from the snack bar.

By the way, for those of you who congratulated her on her smart move of sending her wish list to me via e-mail...the strategy was a big success. She scored everything on the list!

Happy birthday, cutie. We love you!

The B'day List

That was the subject line on the e-mail.

I spend a lot of time at my computer. At work, technology is my job, so I'm almost always looking at my screen, using photoshop, setting up keynote slides, creating training handouts, and checking my 7 different e-mail accounts.

Then I get home...and use the computer a lot there, as well. Blogging. Reading blogs. Browsing web sites. Etc. Etc. Etc.

I'm not saying I ignore my family. You guys know I spend plenty of time doing the family stuff. But still, I love my computer time, as well.

And Daughter13 is no dummy! Her birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks. And she has a list of wants and needs. But she didn't just scribble it out and hand it to me or her mom. And she didn't just tell us about it over dinner.

Nope, she knew just how to put that list where I would be most certain of seeing it and dealing with it.

She e-mailed it to me. With instructions that said I could "print it out when I went shopping".

Now is that a kid who knows how to get things done, or what?!?

What Girls Wear

I went back-to-school shopping with Daughter13 and my wife a couple of weeks ago. I know, the first thing that pops into your head is "am I insane?" Nope. I actually thought it would be a supportive and helpful thing to do. So we headed to the mall for school clothing.

As we entered the first store, I made my move. I asked what sizes my daughter wore so I could assist in the search. Again you wonder, have I lost my mind? Nope. But I knew if I didn't stake my claim as a "helper" right up front, I would end up sitting in the corner holding the purses. Or worse yet, sent to the food court till the entire event was complete.

As it turns out, Daughter13 was not 100% humiliated to have me helping, so she actually responded to my question. She shrugged. Not being entirely sure what size the shrug indicated, I turned to my wife. She ventured that she wasn't certain, this being our daughter's first time moving up from the girl's department to full-blown adult wear, but she thought we should look for a size 1 in jeans.

One? How can someone who is thirteen years old wear a one?!?! I thought those were for babies. Remember the 1T size? How did we get back to a '1' all over again?

Not wanting to rock the boat, I kept my mouth shut and went to look for jeans in size one. Once a few different pairs of jeans had been located, Daughter13 went to try things on. And guess what? They were too big.

So now what? Turns out there is a size zero. Zero. As in nothing. How freaking small must a pair of jeans be to be a zero?!? But as we scanned the zero pile, the kindly salesperson suggested that those might not fit, either. Nope, she suggested double zero.

Who ever heard of double zero???? And just what the hell are they? Is this like a bra...a double-A cup is bigger than an A cup? Turns out...nothing like a bra. A double zero is smaller than a zero.

Roll that phrase around in your head for a minute. Smaller than a zero. How can that be? How can clothing come in sizes smaller than zero???

So off we went in search of double zero sized jeans. Insane. And as I flipped through racks of size 2 and 3, I couldn't help but wonder....are the teens who wear those sizes giants?!?! Suddenly a 2 seemed gargantuan compared to double zero. Clearly, all reason has been set aside. Numbers on girls' clothing are meaningless.

Fortunately, we did find double zero jeans. Plenty of them. And Daughter13 now has pants to wear.

Then we had to find shirts. To cut a long story short, I'll just say that the lack of logic was consistent. She does not wear double zero shirts. Not even close.

Who made up this system? And on what basis did they choose these numbers? When I need pants, I measure my waist. Thirty-six. So I go to the store and buy size 34 cause I know I'm gonna drop a few pounds soon...right? And then I go home. The numbers and the size actually relate to MY size. Not for girls. Not for women.

Next time I'm waiting in the food court.

Ladies and Gentlemen...

I present to you, the Class of 2011!!

That's right, Daughter13 is starting her freshman year in high school. Orientation was yesterday. Tryouts for the freshman girl's volleyball team was today. As my wife says, "our little baby is going to high school!"

I know when she got up on Friday she was pretty much the same person as when she went to bed on Thursday night. And yet, in her new shirt and jeans, heading off to high school, she suddenly looked taller. And older. More grown up.

How can that be my little girl?!?!

Damn, they do grow up fast. Sometimes, it seems like it happens overnight.

How do you spell "Perfect"?

I've mentioned a few times that our family enjoys camping. We used to do the tent thing - even sleeping in the tents when Daughter13 was still in a portable crib. But eventually dodging the weather and dragging stuff for a family of five took it's toll. We saved up some money and bought a ten-year-old camper, parked it at a favorite campground, and we've been spending as much of every summer there as we can for the past eight years. My wife and some of the kids practically live there during the summer and I join them on weekends and commute back and forth two or three days a week.

This past weekend was one of those weekends. And it was gorgeous. The weather was absolutely perfect...sunny, warm days, seasonable evenings, no rain in sight. And on a weekend like that, there is time to squeeze in so many fun things with the family.

Both Daughter13 and Son17 enjoy fishing (never fear, we always catch and release!). And while they will gladly fish with a hook and some bait, they have mastered the art of throwing a fresh-water clam in a net and actually catching fish right in their net! It amazes the crowds!




Swimming? Of course! The kids love to swim. My wife and I prefer the more leisurely approach - we float! We grab a couple of tubes, paddle out past all the kids who are splashing and chasing frisbees, and just relax enjoying the water and the sun. And if my scintillating conversation isn't enough to keep her interested, my wife has mastered the art of carrying her book out into the middle of the lake, on the tube, and reading. Without ever getting the book wet!

We took the paddle boat out one day and cruised the lake. A nice, relaxing ride to enjoy the water plants and the water animals! Check out the baby turtle hiding on the lily pad!

I was even able to convince Daughter13 to jump in a kayak and the two of us went all around the lake the next day enjoying the beauty of an early Sunday morning.







And what weekend of camping would be complete without toasting - and in some cases burning - a bunch of marshmallows over a campfire?!? In this photo, the marshmallows actually are not on fire, the light is just reflection from a slower shutter speed. But we did have a couple of servings of Marshmallow Flambe'.

It was a pretty perfect weekend. How many days is it until next Friday???

Look Ma, I'm back!

After a long break from the blog, I am back at the keyboard. I know, I know...the excitement is almost more than you can bear. So I'll try to start with a low-key post so you can ease back into the routine of reading stuff coming out of my corner.

First of all, for those of you who worried that I jumped in my new little red car and rode off into the horizon, no such luck. "Little Red" and I have been busy but not going anywhere quite so exciting.

So what has been going on? What has happened since I last wrote?

Son17 had to have an MRI. This came up rather quickly due to elevated prolactin levels in a blood test. This can be a side effect of his medications, but it can lead to some more serious problems. So the MRI was to make certain that no damage was being done to various brain regions. The results were all fine. Nothing to worry about. But the procedure took most of a day. Son17 definitely does not have the ability to lay still for an hour inside that machine. So they had to give him a general anesthetic. So we had to be there early, have little "pre-procedure" meetings with anesthesiologists, nurses, doctors, etc. Have the actual MRI. Then hang around long enough for him to recover and wobble out to the car.

Son19 turned into Son20. Fascinating how my kids' names change every year, huh?

The school year ended for me. Pardon me while I do the dance of joy one more time.......

Okay, I'm back. And while I work year-round, the summer schedule is much less hectic. Since a large part of what I do is professional development with our staff, the end of the year saw all of my different workshop series coming to a close. In the last three weeks of school I led eight different workshops. I was exhausted!

School also ended for the kids. If you could peek into the other room, you could see them doing the dance of joy, as well. Well, truthfully, they aren't dancing. But I do fear they have become permanently attached to the Game Cube.

Daughter13 graduated middle school, so the end of the year took on a special significance for her. A small graduation ceremony in the morning followed by her first official dance that night. After seeing her head off to the bus every day in jeans and a sweatshirt, she surely looked all grown up in her new dress. And yes, a boy did ask her to the dance. He did not pick her up here...since he is only 13 and can't drive. But he did wait for her out front and escort her through a very nice evening. And Daughter13's report on the evening...the DJ was good, the snacks were good, Justin did get her punch, Justin did dress up even though some boys just wore shorts and a t-shirt, and they didn't kiss, they only hugged.

Last but not least, the opening of the camper. We own a camper that stays parked in a campground year round about 45 minutes from our house. As soon as school ends every year, we open it up, clean it up, and get ready for a summer of camping. My wife and the younger kids will live there much of the summer and I'll alternate sleeping at home and commuting to work from the camper during the weeks and will spend all weekends there. Some people have a summer home. We have a summer bed on wheels. But we love it. And today was the day Son20 and I went down to set up the deck, put up the screen porch, hook up all the utilities, air out the camper, and get it ready for some inside cleaning and fun.

And that, my good blogger friends, is what I've been doing while I was missing from the keyboard. But I've surely missed you! Jocelyn and Winston and Barb and Dorky Dad and May and Rebecca and Wizened and Wendz and Liv and Chelle and thethinker and Sheila and Redneck Mommy and .... well, instead of listing more, I'm going to read! I'm sure I've got a lot of catching up to do!!

Winter Break

Yep, this is the week our schools take off so we can all sit around and think about how cold it is outside. The time off doesn't really apply to Son19 since the colleges keep right on having classes and his job keeps right on expecting him to show up. But the rest of us are getting a break in one way or another.

My wife took the opportunity to go visit her mom again - who just finished her second round of chemo and is slowly recovering.

I'm sleeping late, catching up on my Netflix movies, spending far too much time on the internet, and reading a lot. I know, I know...those of you who are working this week can just go ahead and hate me! :)

But no one knows how to celebrate a week off like Son16 and Daughter13. I have managed to convince them to shower and change clothes at least once since school ended last Friday. And they have eaten most meals. But if I really want to see Daughter13, I have to take the book out of her hands (she is totally hooked on the Guardians of Ga'hoole series) or try to find her over her DS.

Son16 will either be found building new robots and castles and anything else that comes to mind with Legos, or he'll be hiding behind his own DS.

The best way to tell them apart? By the games they play!

A Dinner At School

Tonight was a very nice evening for our family. Daughter13 was installed as a member of the Leo Club at her middle school. For those who aren't familiar with it, the Leo Club is the youth service program of the Lion's Club.

When she first came home and said she wanted to be in the Leo Club, we asked what that was. She said she didn't know for sure - just some kind of club that helped people. That sounded good to us!

So she has been busy this year doing bowling fund raisers, gathering money for a boundless playground, and collecting used eyeglasses to aid those who can't afford them. And tonight the club members made dinner and served their families. And the dinner was followed by a small program where new members were formally installed as members.

Daughter13 is a good kid. I think we'll keep her. :)

Field Trip

Daughter13 left before the crack of dawn this morning for a class trip to Washington, D.C. While I did nothing today other than go to work and get a hair cut, she travelled over 350 miles, toured Mount Vernon, checked into her hotel, and is, at this very moment, beginning an 'illumination tour' of some of the most prominent landmarks in our nation.

For the next four days, her and 239 other eighth graders will get on and off buses about a hundred times while visiting monuments, memorials, museums, restaurants and gift shops.

Two years ago I had the opportunity to go along on this trip as a chaperone with Son16. And having been on this class trip, I know my daughter is going to have a wonderful experience. Oh yes, she'll be exhausted by the time each day ends. But she'll also learn more in four days than she could possibly learn in the classroom. She'll see, experience, and touch part of our history.

I'm no super-patriot, but one can hardly stand at some of the memorials without feeling the history they represent. And it is impossible to tour Arlington Cemetary and walk along the Vietnam Memorial without feeling the impact of how many lives have been lost in violent conflict. And the collections of the Smithsonian are varied and massive enough to impress anyone - even a thirteen year old.

The house is unnaturally quiet. We don't have family close by - no weekends with grandparents - so she has never even been away for more than one night at a time. So there is an oddness to her absence. We miss her. And if she weren't busy laughing and talking and looking and exploring and learning, she might miss us too. But right now the important thing is the laughing and talking and looking and exploring and learning.

Enjoy your trip!

Merchants, Performers and Cleavage - OH MY!

This past weekend, my wife and I took two of our kids (Daughter13 and Son16) to the local Renaissance Faire. It was a perfect fall day in New England and our first ever visit to the Faire. And we were all entertained. We all enjoyed shopping at the various merchants and returned home with new jewelry, bits and pieces of upcoming Halloween costumes, some excellent incense, and lots of snacks. We enjoyed various performances by troups of jousters, singing executioners, and a bawdy rendition of the story of Samson by the Pope and Cardinal Show (with none other than me playing the part of Samson!). And yes, there was an abundance of buxom wenches all around.

The best part? Watching the kids. Watching them laugh till it hurt as the executioners performed rap songs. Watching them grin from ear to ear as they got their turn throwing axes and trying their hand at archery. And watching them burst into applause as the sword swallower swallowed! Kids are jaded. Been there. Done that. Got the t-shirt. But then the man SWALLOWED A SWORD! They just don't do that during an assembly at school.

It was a good day as a family. It was a good day to watch kids enjoy being kids.