Thursday, April 19, 2007

The Value of Time

Today is a very special day in our house. Today is our 22nd anniversary!

I looked up the traditional and modern anniversary gifts. Twenty-two years is the copper year. So that means the best gift is...a penny?

Trust me, a mountain of pennies would not reflect the value I place on my marriage. I'm a lucky man and I know it! My wife is beautiful and funny and smart and caring. She's a great parent to our kids. And she manages to see through my faults and still love me.

But this isn't just about me or her. There is value in the time itself. The many things we've done together. The things we've shared. We have each become the holder of the other's history. We can teach our kids - maybe one day our grandkids - about the other because we know their stories. We know what makes them special. We've lived much of it with them and we've heard about the rest in long conversations over dinners and late night talks lasting till 3:00 in the morning.

We're not perfect. I write here about some of the fun and interesting things that happen in our family. I don't usually write about bad things. But we have them. We have disagreements just like anyone else. But truthfully, over 22 years, the disagreements come along much less often. It is almost like we've found our groove. Our lives have a momentum and rhythm all their own and it becomes easier to go forward as we add more richness to our shared history.

Our tradition for our anniversary is to avoid the cards and gifts and just spend time together. So no copper bracelets or copper pots or copper jello molds. I have the day off work and we'll spend some time together at home and then go out for a nice dinner. Probably doesn't seem very exciting. But it is comfortable. And it is about us.

I'm so thankful for these twenty-two years. And I'm looking forward to the next twenty-two! And I wouldn't trade this for all the copper in the world!

38 comments:

Thomas said...

Happy Anniversary.

Me and the misses also do the low key and quiet ann. thing.
It is much nicer than rushing around and trying to be fancy.

TV

Rene said...

Congratulations! Marriage is a tough business and finding someone worth sticking around for is a wonderful thing.

We're pretty quiet on our anniversary. With three kids, we're usually too tired to do much.

Jinsane said...

What a wonderful post!! I hope I find a man that feels that way about me someday!!

Congratulations!!!

Chicky Pea said...

Happy Anniversary, I hope you have a great day.

Shrink wrapped scream said...

Sounds as though you've struck the right balance there. We've been married 17 years. With four children, it's hard to always make time for each other, as the kids have to have top priority. So, one afternoon in every other week, my hubby cancels out his diary, and we have a date together - usually a quiet lunch, or a walk on the beach. It's so nice to not be mum and dad for those few hours!

Elle said...

Wow Happy Anniversary!! That is definately a day worth celebrating!

Oh, The Joys said...

Happy Anniversary!

dawn said...

Happy Anniversary!! What a loving tribute to a marriage. Beautiful

Above Average Joe said...

Congratulations. We are approching 10 years this Oct. I've put plans in motion for us to get away for a weekend.

meno said...

happy anniversary. This is a lovely post about marriage.

Jazz said...

A lovely post about marriage and pretty much what I'd say about mine. Mr Jazz and I will have been together 20 years in a few months, and though it's no longer all fireworks and excitement, I think it's better. It's something much deeper and quieter now, and I wouldn't trade for the world. So nice to hear there are long lasting, loving couples out there! Happy Anniversary!

velvet girl said...

Happy Anniversary!

22 years... wow! This day and age, that's something to be admired. You really do have something special there. :)

Our ten year anniversary is coming up next week. While our friends think that we should leave the kids and go out for the night, we'd rather be at home with the kids having cake. After all, we consider our anniversary the "family birthday" and it wouldn't feel right to not include the kids in something like that.

That Chick Over There said...

Happy Anniversary, copper pennies and all! :)

Rainbow dreams said...

Happy Anniversary...
A wonderful post about marriage and time and things thatmoney can't buy...
Hope you have a lovely day, Katie

Sheila said...

happy anniversary! My boyfriend and I will be celebrating 6 years this june. A few of my friends think it's not really an anniversary because we aren't married... I told them to fuck off. haha Hope you have a really great anniversary! You are quite a catch!

liv said...

Congratulations! Many blessings to you and yours!

charlottalove said...

Happy Anniversary! I love seeing posts like this. I'm not married and sometimes I lose faith that there are quality guys out there. I've seen too many friends get married, get divorced, and become bitter about the whole dating scene. I am SUPER lucky in that I have two amazing examples that love does exist and is worth it: my parents. They have been married 29 years this August.

Thanks for being another example!

Big Brother said...

Happy Anniversary!! Nice post and so true. It only gets better with time. Mrs. BB will have been married for 31 years on May 1st and we do pretty much like you, spend time enjoying ourselves together. I wish you many more anniversaries and much happiness.

thethinker said...

Happy 22nd Anniversary!

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

That was a very beautiful post Em.

Happy Anniversary!

Bardouble29 said...

Happy Anniversary.

What a beautifully written blog.

FENICLE said...

Happy Aniversary!

My husband & I try not to do the cards/gifts thing too. I prefer a quiet dinner alone.

CS said...

Happy anniversary and congratulations to you guys. (But I still think you should cough up the 22 pennies.)

Jocelyn said...

Wait a minute, you have faults?

I love the part about you holding each other's history. Lovely.

fatty said...

congratulations!
there have been times i've thought there is no way i'm growing old with my husband ~ i'll kill him first...
but i've found that "value in time" and it is a wonderful thing.

thanks for visiting my blog and commenting. i look forward to coming back here and rummaging through.

Diesel said...

Congrats! I bet a lot of people are turning green with envy. Get it, because copper... nevermind.

Teena said...

Happy anniversary!!!

SzélsőFa said...

congratulations!
you're a lucky couple !

Kati said...

How about a copper colored roux in a gumbo??? Or a copper-colored sunset shared together??? There are other ways to think "copper".

Happy Anniversary to you & your wife!!!! It's great to hear about couples who've been together (and are happy) that long, when so many seem to call it quits after just a year or two, or stay together miserably.

Wishing you another 30+ years of married happiness!

Mustang said...

Congrats mate... God lead you guys ahead !! you definitely have a lot to pass on to your next generation...

cheers
D

Melody said...

You wrote that post with such thought.

You're right, you don't need to exchange cards or gifts, but you did the right thing by taking the day off work to spend it with your wife. That speaks louder than any card or gift ever could.

My parents celebrated 39 years yesterday (the 20th)... Congratulations on your 22nd. Quite an acheivement these days...

heartinsanfrancisco said...

What a lovely post! Truly beautiful. As this is my first visit to your blog, I could not have picked a better time.

Congratulations to you and your wife on your ongoing happiness, and on being an island of sanity in a world gone fairly crazy.

The next 22 years will be even better, if that can be imagined. So happy for you both.

Rebecca said...

Happy Anniversary, Em! Although I think I am a tad bit late...Hope you had a nice peaceful time.

Paul said...

Happy Anniversary! Thanks for stopping by.

Attila The Mom said...

Happy Anniversary!!

Star said...

Congratulations. And I would say your wife is lucky as well.

foam said...

hey, thanks for dropping by my blog.
and happy anniversary! i've lived with my significant other for 24 years. all those years are certainly an accomplishment.

ps: my mother also likes the weather channel. but since she lives with us she can't argue with us about the weather. (i read your post about your mom obviously..)

Chelle said...

I'm late reading this....but Happy Anniversary!! Twenty two years is awesome.....Time is more precious than ANY gift.....

Congratulations... :)