Tooth Hygiene

I'm a brusher, not a flosser. Much to the dismay of my dentist, I've never really enjoyed the flossing experience. But I brush on a regular basis just like everyone else.

But now with the braces, I'm supposed to brush even more. Morning and night isn't good enough. Now I've got instructions to brush four times a day. After each meal and then at bedtime. And I've even got myself some prescription toothpaste to do it with.

Mostly I don't mind. I hate the feeling of things being stuck in the braces. And when I try to lick/suck/tongue/work it out on my own, I look like a dog that just bit a big spoonful of peanut butter. So brushing helps avoid all those facial contortions.

However, I have to say, brushing my teeth at work is weird. I don't know why it strikes me as weird. But it does. I feel odd standing in the big staff bathroom and brushing while various folks wander in and out to take care of their .....ummm....needs. And somehow, in my head, that all seems just a bit awkward....me brushing and drooling and them peeing.

So I've taken to brushing in my office. I try to make sure I do it without any of the drooling. But then, I have to wander down one hall, turn the corner and head down another hall, just to get to the bathroom so I can spit and rinse. The walk is odd..meeting folks while my mouth is full of bubbles and paste and a toothbrush...

"Hi Em, how's it going?"

"Mmm mmm..mmmm."

I thought about going and spitting and rinsing at the water fountain. But would I want to get a drink after someone else just spit there? Nope. So out of consideration....I haven't.

Maybe it isn't too late to ask Santa for a spittoon for my office.

Braces. Yep, you heard me. Braces.

I'm 52 years old...and yesterday I got braces. Two hours at the orthodontist and I've got a mouth full of metal and ceramic and I look sooooo handsome.

NOT.


That is not actually a photo of me...but it looks exactly like mine. Ceramic brackets on top with metal on the bottom. And one tooth without a bracket on the bottom. And my reasons for getting braces are just like this example...overcrowding on the bottom. So, like this person, the tooth without the bracket will be "excised" next Monday and will allow space for the teeth around it to close up and straighten.

Excise is a nice word, huh? Much better than pull....or yank. But that will be Step #2 next Monday.

Meanwhile, I'm enjoying a lot of pudding and mashed potatoes and applesauce. The soreness is definitely there...but the biggest issue is that my top teeth can't close all the way against my bottom teeth. So even if things weren't sore, I still would not be able to chew. I've been reassured this is normal and will resolve itself. I hope that resolution happens soon!

So is the soreness and the lack of chewing the biggest problem? Nope. The biggest problem is that I'm 52 years old and yesterday I got braces! Some things you just think you left behind when you were a teenager. But nope, it is never too late.

And does my vanity kick in? Oh yes. I'm quite certain that my awesome natural good looks just won't hide the fact that I have braces. However, my wife did say I looked "adorable".

Of course, she was laughing a bit when she said it.